Suffice to say that over the years I have gotten many, many rejection letters from publishers and agents. It started with my first book that was finally published in 2014, and it has been going on continuously since I started querying my latest one back in September. Most of the time I just let the rejections roll off my back and think nothing more of it. As a writer you’ll get far more rejections than you will interest, and that’s okay. It’s just part of the process, practically a right of passage!

Back in December one of the publishers wrote to me to say they wanted more time for consideration. I very enthusiastically said of course, and then continued to wait. Sometime in January I got back with them, and was told they were still deciding. Then, about a week ago (into February now) I sent another email and was told they would have a decision too.

Well, that decision came today. While I was on my way to a family dinner at a local state park for a relatives birthday. It was yet another rejection, nicely written and pointing out what they liked about the story but what they also believe I could do to improve it. For some reason this rejection felt a little harder to swallow than the others, I guess because I had been waiting for so long to hear back from them.

It was disheartening, and I hate that I do feel down about it. I try to be positive, to keep searching, but sometimes it’s very hard to do that. I think it’s because I go into queries with little expectation, but this one gave me hope. I felt like this could be it, that I could have found someone who believed in my story as much as I do and then got my legs kicked out from under me.

The lesson here is don’t let your guard down, always keep that level of doubt. Things feel less disappointing that way, I think. Or maybe that’s just me feeling sorry for myself. It’s hard to say at this point.

For now I’m waiting on a few more queries to see if anything happens while I start delving more into the realm of self-publishing. This book is the first in a trilogy, with possibly some other material to come too. I know I don’t have to hold on forever, that other options exist now, and it might be time to consider that avenue instead.

Whatever happens next, I know I’ll get over feeling sorry for myself. This was just a rough one.

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